Traveler Introverted: Welcome to Cleveland!

It was 6:30am on July 21, 2017, when I called my friend Angie and asked her for her whereabouts. She was supposed to accompany me on the road trip we had planned to my Facebook group’s very first meet & greet in Cleveland. Angie told me that she was close. I knew better though. Close meant that she was about an hour away, and it turned out that I was right. We were supposed to be on the road by 6:30am, in order to make it to Cleveland by 2:30pm from my Harlem based, New York City apartment. Angie was late but that’s my boo, so she was very easily forgiven. We were about to embark on our very first road trip to a place that neither one of us had ever been. But first, we need to pick up three more passengers.

I drove to the Inwood section of Manhattan to pick up our Facebook group co-creator Aisha, along with her cousin and best friend. Aisha was super excited, as per usual. Aisha is an extrovert. She interacts with this world very differently from the way that I do. She and I can be in the same place, seeing the same thing at the same time, and still experience it on opposite ends of the social interaction spectrum. She’s a “high five me” kind of girl. I’m more of a “smile and nod” kind of girl. We get along great though.

Allow me to explain my introversion. People often confuse it with me being shy, which is not the case. I have difficulty exposing myself to new people. It feels unnatural for me to walk into a room full of people, and approach them with the intent of getting to know them all. My natural stance is to kind of play the background, feel the energy of the room and people watch. As an introvert, I’m not great at small talk. I find it difficult to jump into conversations that are already bustling, even though I can be thoroughly enjoying the things that are stated. My quiet is often seen as awkward for those who don’t know me but I’m the life of the party with a group of people that I know well. Now imagine being an introvert who wants to travel the world. That’s a tall order for a homebody but it’s a challenge that I love approaching.

How is an introvert able to facilitate positive and fun engagement opportunities in a group of over 22,000 people? There’s a simple answer. It’s easy. Engaging a group of people online is actually a “party of one” type situation. When I create posts, it’s not happening in front of an audience because everything is an individual message to people that I can’t actually see. Replying to responses, is a simple one to one action, and none of it includes small talk. Engaging people online is easy, hence the era of twitter fingers, cyber bullying, and unsolicited peen pics. All of the effort depicted in my facebook group has culminated to this very moment…the drive to Cleveland.

The drive to Cleveland was fun. We talked about boys, seat-danced to rump shaking music, hit snapchat hard, and laughed as Aisha rapped “Spit These Barz” by Drag-on line for line, rap hands included. We stopped for food a few times and did big booty black girl stretches in the parking lot. One of those stops included a franchize that refused to serve us food. According to the hostess, they were just too busy to seat us, though we did notice that the restaurant came to a slow calm when we rushed in with all of our jovial melanated confection. There were also multiple tables open, which were easily visible from the hostess station. I think we were experiencing racism. That’s me speculating but I can do that because I’m an energy feeling people watcher, and this is my story. We obviously went to pick up food elsewhere. That experience didn’t dampen our mood one bit.

I had driven 6.5 hours before I asked Angie to take the wheel of the vehicle. I was tired. I wasn’t use to doing long distance driving. When we were close to the hotel, my heart began to palpitate. The reality of the situation began to sink in. We were about to meet a group of strangers for the first time, simply because we started a facebook travel group for Black singles. We had no idea how popular it would become or how fast. The group had only started in May of 2017.

My stomach knotted slightly as we got the key to our rooms. What was I doing? How’d I get to Cleveland? I wanted to go home. Home is always my safe place. What if more than 5 people showed up and I had to talk to multiple strangers at one time without the sufficient time I needed to quietly watch their body language and way they interacted with other people in the room?! I was the group co-creator, I was supposed to mingle right?! Extroverts always want introverts to be extroverts. Introverts never tell extroverts to go sit down and stop extroverting all over the damn place. Where was my acceptance?

The time had come, people were downstairs waiting for Aisha and I to make our appearances, as Admin and Co-creators of the Singles Black Travel Group. It was showtime. I drank a red solo cup full of what I thought was one quarter malibu rum and three quarters pineapple juice. I’d like to formally announce that those measurements were actually in reverse. Aisha made my drink so strong that I forgot I drank it and thereby had another.

Before I continue this story, please understand that my tolerance for alcohol is low. I’d like to blame it on a hereditary predisposition to alcoholism. My mother told me to stop saying that but her tolerance is weak too. So, in that regard, I speak for the both of us. My tolerance for any substance stronger than water is TRASH. There…I said it.

Hopped up on liquid courage, I made my way downstairs. Now, here is where the story gets fuzzy. Apparently, I had an amazing time at our meetup, as depicted by pictures and video. I can only reference pictures because I blacked out the rest of the night. I remember bits and pieces of the night but not the night in its entirety. Before you find your judgy pants, let me explain.

I didn’t pass out, vomit, dance on any tables, take my clothes off, or end up in anyone else’s bed. This isn’t that kind of journey. My brain somehow lost memory of the night, after I got downstairs. I simply had too much to drink. What I will describe to you at this point, is the account of my body being led by a version of me dubbed #LitBae. Apparently, once the match was lit, I kept going and going and going. I became a 5’9” ball of energy. #LitBae didn’t work alone though. She was accompanied at all times by Aisha, as  #TwerkBae, an identity she accidentally incepted for herself.

We stayed in Cleveland for three days and here was my experience by timeline (give or take an hour that I probably forgot). I had to ask for help with the recall:

Friday (Day 1) Meet & Greet

4:00pm– Shop for meet & greet supplies like responsible adults (insert alcohol purchase here).

5:00pm– Shower, dress,” light” alcoholic beverage to assist with anxiety.

6:30pm– Do a little dance and aggravate Angie prior to meet & greet. #DrinkRefill

7:00pm– Kariba fades to darkness. #LitBae makes first appearance. She had multiple cups of fruit soaked rum punch, then eventually ditched the punch and only ate the fruit. #NeverEatTheFruit

7:30pm– #TwerkBae falls victim to candid shot of her twerking #LitBae into a corner.

8:00pm– This timeslot is only here to maintain consistency. I don’t know what was going on.

8:30pm– I was driven in the backseat of my car to Margaritaville. I recall standing on line for something. It might have been the bathroom.

9:00pm– #TwerkBae and I dirty danced to “Sweet Home Alabama” in front of an old white man wearing a cowboy hat.

9:30pm– I distinctly remember not remembering where I was at the moment but danced while walking down the street, yelling something about being happy and free.

10:00pm– #TwerkBae went live in the facebook group, forcing me to pretend to be sober but I went on a tangent about nothing anyway. It was also in this time that I met a slightly older Black lady from Cleveland who spoke to me about how pretty I was. I thanked her as I called her attention to her areola, exposed through the lines of her bondage inspired shirt. I told her to fix her boob twice but she kept telling me how “geeked” she was to be downtown.

11:00pm– I assume that Angie got me to the room and in bed. #LitBae departed.

Saturday (Day 2) Cedar Point Theme Park

10:00am– Meetup for all those going to Cedar Point. Saw group member that I had frequently interacted with the night before (allegedly). He must’ve showed up after 7:00pm #KanyeShrug

10:30am– Went to get breakfast but the restaurant lost my order completely and I ended up eating for free! #Goals

10:45am– Clowned by group member for driving the speed limit. I’m a law abiding citizen.

11:30am– Rollercoaster time. Spent time explaining all of the reasons that I shouldn’t be riding the first coaster. Nobody cared. Went on to ride other coasters in fear.

12:00pm– Screamed really loudly and then stopped screaming because I passed out.

12:01pm– Came to with the realization that I passed out and screamed again because the ride was still happening.

12:30pm– Took the longest walk in America to find a restaurant to eat in.

1:30pm– Ate at restaurant and was asked to leave indirectly by the manager because our laugher was too loud. (You weren’t low Maureen. We knew what you were doing!)

3:00pm– I don’t remember this part and I was sober. Forgive me.

4:00pm– Back to the hotel for that hot tub life

5:00pm– Hot tub featuring rum punch and red wine. It is at this time that Angie expressed her disdain for being my “handler” for the weekend. I don’t know why because I’m awesome.

6:00pm– Went to my room because I needed alone time and red wine puts me in my feelings. I took a shower and went to bed. The rest of them folks got dressed and went out to party.

Sunday (Day 3) Journey Home

10:00am- Lots of R&B music because apparently I was still in my feelings and needed alone time. The women I rode with were very understanding.

All in all, I would say it was a good trip. There are pictures of me jumping on the bed in a pink fitted dress and another of me lying on the rum punch cooler with Aisha using my booty for head support when she got tired. Never mind, I had a GREAT time. What’s even better is that we go live in our group for events, so there is a ton of footage to support my timeline.

My trip concluded at 7:30pm on Sunday evening. It took me about a week to start feeling like myself again but I wasn’t somber at all. I was still an overt introvert during the trip. I can count quite a few times when awkward silence hit. That happens to everyone but it feels especially awkward for me because I’ve become keen on noticing times where other people may spot my introversion.

I use to look at being an introvert as a vice that I possessed. I tried my hardest to get rid of it. However, I’ve come to realize that it’s one of my greatest strengths Because of my introversion, I’m an avid reader, great listener, and awesome people reader. I can see many of the things that people aren’t saying. My introversion makes me compassionate. There’s nothing wrong with me. I just walk in this world differently. I also happen to travel in this world differently. I see the world with a different set of eyes because I’m watching and feeling it. I allow it to exist in its own state and I’m humbled by the differences in the places that I visit. My travels assist me with my introspective processes. I know that everything is not as it seems and in the same token, things just are what they are.

I am a traveler, though introverted, and there are so many places in this world for me to see. I’m about to introvert all over this damn place.